Anyone who has a sibling will tell you that the competition between brothers and sisters can be intense. In everyday situations, such as fighting over control of the remote, this sibling rivalry becomes nothing more than a petty argument. However, when siblings face off against each other as athletes, the situation gets more complex, as they must balance their own desire to win with the desire to see their sibling succeed. It is through this internal struggle that sibling competition becomes the ideal form of good sportsmanship.
If you need an example of why this is true, just talk to the Columbia men’s basketball coach, Joe Jones. On Saturday night, Jones faced off against his brother, the coach of the Yale men’s basketball team, James Jones. The weekend matchup, which at first glance appeared to be out of the twilight zone, was a perfect example of sibling competition at work. While each coach was 100 percent focused on giving his team the best chance at winning the game, there were other forces at play as well.
“You know, when we lose, there’s a part of me that’s happy for him that he’s won a game. It’s like this thing that you can’t explain unless you’re in it,” Joe Jones said. For most athletes, the sight of the opponent celebrating in victory is sickening, but this is not the case for Jones. After a game against Yale, regardless of the outcome, Jones is never completely happy or defeated. His relationship with his brother prevents his emotions from reaching the extremes, which is exactly the point of good sportsmanship. Children are taught at an early age to be humble and respectful in both victory and defeat. However, most athletes forget this message because it is incredibly difficult to remain calm and collected in a world that thrives off of emotion. What you end up with are athletes that alternate between the emotional extremes. If you need a guide to good sportsmanship, just turn to the Joneses of the world: the Manning brothers, the Williams sisters, the Barry brothers.
At this point, it’s easy to find fault with my examples by pointing out that all of these duos are professional players or college coaches. In these cases, it’s fair to argue that the siblings paint an overly positive picture to the media in order to avoid controversy. While it is true that sibling rivalries pose problems, the idea that brother and sister athletes display the truest form of good sportsmanship holds true even in amateur play.
I have competed with my brother at everything imaginable, from getting good grades to playing basketball. During the moments of competition, such as playing one-on-one, I tried my best to crush him (the little brother has to learn his place, right?). However, just as Jones pointed out earlier, I was never completely happy in victory or angry in defeat. I won’t try to claim that I am a good sport. I don’t like seeing the other guy win the trophy, and I don’t necessarily want to shake his hand after a heated game. But when I compete against my brother, I’m as good a sport as I will ever be, and that’s saying something.
If you’ve read this column expecting a solution to the grave problem that is unsportsmanlike conduct, then you’re going to be disappointed. All I’ve provided is something to strive for—the ideal. Who knows, maybe you can get everyone to act like siblings by singing “Kumbaya” or something. Whatever the solution may be, the point is that siblings have figured out something that the rest of the sports world needs to pick up.
Bart Lopez is a Columbia College junior majoring in economics-mathematics.
sportseditors@columbiaspectator.com
